I am too alone in the world, and yet not alone enough
to make every moment holy.
I am too tiny in this world, and not tiny enough
just to lie before you like a thing,
shrewd and secretive.
I want my own will, and I want simply to be with my will,
as it goes toward action;
and in those quiet, sometimes hardly moving times,
when something is coming near,
I want to be with those who know secret things
or else alone.
I want to be a mirror for your whole body,
and I never want to be blind, or to be too old
to hold up your heavy and swaying picture.
I want to unfold.
I don’t want to stay folded anywhere,
because where I am folded, there I am a lie.
and I want my grasp of things to be
true before you. I want to describe myself
like a painting that I looked at
closely for a long time,
like a saying that I finally understood,
like the pitcher I use every day,
like the face of my mother,
like a ship
that carried me
through the wildest storm of all.
Rainer Maria Rilke
And while they’re at it, they’re all talking to each other – photos and messages and films being flung about. Or rather, they’re arguing with each other – with multiple iCloud and Dropbox accounts on multiple devices, and it all gets a bit murky. The place may be a lot less cluttered, but my shoebox full of photos never used to require this much constant administration. Quite when, where and how it’s okay to delete content is all sorts of confusing. It’s not so much living in the cloud as getting lost in the fog.

Today, like every other day, we wake up empty
and frightened. Don’t open the door to the study
and begin reading. Take down the dulcimer.
Let the beauty we love be what we do. There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.”

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.

When the soul lies down in that grass
the world is too full to talk about.”

“Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment.”

“Forget safety.
Live where you fear to live.
Destroy your reputation.
Be notorious.”

“Take someone who doesn’t keep score,
who’s not looking to be richer, or afraid of losing,
who has not the slightest interest even
in his own personality: he’s free.”

“Be melting snow.
Wash yourself of yourself.”

“When someone is counting out
gold for you, don’t look at your hands,
or the gold. Look at the giver.”

“Is it really so that the one I love is everywhere?”

“All people on the planet are children, except for a very few. No one is grown up except those free of desire.”

“Put your thoughts to sleep,
do not let them cast a shadow
over the moon of your heart.
Let go of thinking.”

If anyone wonders how Jesus raised the dead,
don’t try to explain the miracle.
Kiss me on the lips.

Like this. Like this.

When someone asks what it means
to “die for love,” point
here.
If someone asks how tall I am, frown
and measure with your fingers the space
between the creases on your forehead.

This tall.

“Don’t try to steer the boat.
Don’t open shop for yourself. Listen. Keep silent.
You are not God’s mouthpiece. Try to be an ear,
And if you do speak, ask for explanations.”

“Look past your thoughts, so you may
drink the pure nectar of This Moment.”

All day I think about it, then at night I say it.
Where did I come from, and what am I supposed to be doing?
I have no idea.
My soul is from elsewhere, I’m sure of that,and I intend to end up there.

Who looks out with my eyes? What is the soul?
I cannot stop asking.
If I could taste one sip of an answer,
I could break out of this prison for drunks.
I didn’t come here of my own accord, and I can’t leave that way.
Whoever brought me here will have to take me home.

“Listen with ears of tolerance! See through the eyes of compassion! Speak with the language of love”

“I searched for God and found only myself. I searched for myself and found only God.”

“I don’t want learning, or dignity, or respectability. I want this music, and this dawn, and the warmth of your cheek against mine.”

“Why struggle to open a door between us when the whole wall is an illusion?”

“Whenever we manage to love without expectations,
calculations, negotiations, we are indeed in heaven.”

“I died as a mineral and became a plant,
I died as a plant and rose to animal,
I died as an animal and I was Man.
Why should I fear? When was I less by dying?”

“Move outside the tangle of fear-thinking. Live in silence.”

You who have no Love in your heart,
you can go back to sleep.

The power of Love
is exclusive to us,
you can go back to sleep.

I have been burnt
by the fire of Love.
You who have no such yearning in your heart,
go back to sleep.

Let me feel you enter each limb bone by bone,
that what died last night can be whole today.

Why live some soberer way, and feel you ebbing out?
I won’t do it.

Either give me enough wine or leave me alone,
now that I know how it is
to be with you in constant conversation.”

“Let go of your mind and then be mindful.
Close your ears and listen!”

What are these pleasures then,
these joys, these worlds
that you keep reaching for,
hoping they will make you more alive?

“There is a loneliness more precious than life. There is a freedom more precious than the world. Infinitely more precious than life and the world is that moment when one is alone with God.”

“Soul, if you want to learn secrets,

your heart must forget about
shame
 and dignity.
You are God’s lover,

yet you worry
what people
are saying.”

“Love said to me, there is nothing that is not me. Be silent.”

“The intelligent desire self-control; children want candy.”

“People who repress desires
often turn, suddenly,
into hypocrites.”

“Knowledge that is acquired
is not like this. Those who have it worry if
audiences like it or not.
It’s a bait for popularity.
Disputational knowing wants customers.
It has no soul…
The only real customer is God.
Chew quietly
your sweet sugarcane God-Love, and stay
playfully childish.”

“For years, copying other people, I tried to know myself.
From within, I couldn’t decide what to do.
Unable to see, I heard my name being called.
Then I walked outside.”

“No one can tell if I’m laughing or weeping.

I wonder myself.”

“Love rests on no foundation. It is an endless ocean, with no beginning or end.”

How does a part of the world leave the world?
How can wetness leave water?

Do not try to put out a fire
by throwing on more fire.
Do not wash a wound with blood.

No matter how fast you run,
your shadow more than keeps up.
Sometimes it’s in front.

Only full, overhead sun
diminishes your shadow.

But that shadow has been serving you.
What hurts you blesses you.
Darkness is your candle.
Your boundaries are your quest.”

“There is a way between voice and presence, where information flows.
In disciplined silence it opens; with wandering talk it closes.”

“Sit quietly and listen for a voice that will say, “Be more silent.” As that happens, your soul starts to revive.”

“The way you make love is the way God will be with you.”

“I went inside my heart
to see how it was.
Something there makes me hear
the whole world weeping.”

I hear so many stories
and explanations, but I keep quiet,
because I don’t know anything,
and because something I swallowed
in the ocean
has made me completely content
with ignorance.

“The result of my life is no more than three words: I was raw, I became cooked, I was burnt.”

“The art of knowing is knowing what to ignore.”

“If it is bread that you seek, you will have bread.
If it is the soul you seek, you will find the soul.
If you understand this secret, you know you are that which you seek.”

“Observe the wonders as they occur around you. Don’t claim them. Feel the artistry moving through and be silent.”

“Oh my friend, all that you see of me is a shell, the rest belongs to love.”

“Is your face a beautiful blossom
or a sweet torture?
I have no complaints
but my heart is tempted
to let you
hear of its sorrows.”

“When someone critises or disagrees with you, a small ant of hatred and antagonism is born in your heart. If you do not squash that ant at once, it might grow into a snake, or even a dragon.”

“Shut your eyes so the heart may become your eye, and with that vision look upon another world. If you can step away from your need for self-approval, all that you do, top to bottom, will be approved.”

“Know the true definition of yourself. That is essential.
Then, when you know your own definition, flee from it.”

“Speak Little. Learn the words of eternity.
Go beyond your tangled thoughts and
find the splendor of paradise.”

“Study me as much as you like, you will never know me, for I differ a hundred ways from what you see me to be. Put yourself behind my eyes, and see me as I see myself, for I have chosen to dwell in a place you cannot see.”

“Your misconceptions veil the holy. The Princess is naked
beneath the surface of every form. Your boredom would
vanish if you had more of a clue about the Reality I know.”

“Get yourself out of the way, and let joy have more space.”

“Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes around in another form.

I want to see you.

Know your voice.

Recognize you when you
first come ‘round the corner.

Sense your scent when I come
into a room you’ve just left.

Know the lift of your heel,
the glide of your foot.

Become familiar with the way
you purse your lips
then let them part,
just the slightest bit,
when I lean in to your space
and kiss you.

I want to know the joy
of how you whisper
“more”

Rumi 

Dreams that you’ve been revived

Dreams that you’ve been revived
dreams that you’re still alive
called for help within a dream
called your name before it seems
you smiled and laughed and mocked me
but you never mocked a dead tree
you never smiled antagonizingly
but in my dream
you seemed to forget who you were.
A 7 foot tall paramedic
and a cell phone that didn’t exist then
served to save your life
my quick wit, my one call, could have been
two
but just one
and it was enough
it was sufficient
to bring you back
to recommission
your role in that life in this life
so it seems
you were dead then alive
so it seems you weren’t Jesus Christ
after all
but you were good
you were good
you were back again.

Black testified that Bruner confessed to shooting Moore with one of two guns he had taken to the parking lot of the Northstar Stadium 14 theaters on Northpark Lane after seeing a photo of Moore and Dawn Bruner together that was posted on Facebook.

The detective said Bruner told him that he and his teenage daughter were at a McDonald’s restaurant when the girl, checking out her Facebook page on her smartphone, saw a picture of her mother in the company of Moore with a caption that read “Date Night.” The picture, posted on Moore’s Facebook page, was “tagged” with Dawn Bruner’s name and consequently popped up on her daughter’s page.

Dawn Bruner told the court that Moore had asked a woman to take the photo of them in front of the theater complex with his phone.

Black said the defendant acknowledged seeing the photo at the restaurant and taking his daughter home, where they looked it up a second time on a computer screen. Bruner admitted that he then grabbed two handguns, a Ruger LCP and a Glock, and headed for the theater complex with the intention of confronting the couple, the detective said.

(Reblogged from new-aesthetic)

Xiamen, China. December 2013.

Loneliness does not come from having no people around you, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to you.
Carl Jung (via arpeggia) h/t adammoore

(Source: likeafieldmouse)

(Reblogged from arpeggia)

I met the girl recently
who (like me) likes me
and black coffee
and not milk tea
and naturally
we talked about we
without hesitating
without escaping
sat in silence noting
the erasing of the stars
by our city ending
each day with a puff of smoke
sent to our air
rescinding nature’s presence
ending before it really got started
or had a chance to know everything
or sit under the tree again
years later when everything has changed
everything except the coffee and the smoke and the tree and we.

17 seconds from China, from a hotel in a city called Ningde.

From Out The Cave

When you have been
at war with yourself
for so many years that
you have forgotten why,
when you have been driving
for hours and only
gradually begin to realize
that you have lost the way,
when you have cut
hastily into the fabric,
when you have signed
papers in distraction,
when it has been centuries
since you watched the sun set
or the rain fall, and the clouds,
drifting overhead, pass as flat
as anything on a postcard;
when, in the midst of these
everyday nightmares, you
understand that you could
wake up,
you could turn
and go back
to the last thing you
remember doing
with your whole heart:
that passionate kiss,
the brilliant drop of love
rolling along the tongue of a green leaf,
then you wake,
you stumble from your cave,
blinking in the sun,
naming every shadow
as it slips.

(Joyce Sutphen) 

via Ian Morgan Cron

12 Seconds from China

16 Seconds from China - March 29, 2012

Columbia MO coal

I-44 today.